Finding the right therapist for you
Preface
Therapy greatly benefited me when I was in a particularly confusing time in my life. As someone who studied Psychology, it’s no surprise that I highly recommend therapy to anyone who is feeling lost in life, anyone who is going through traumatic and painful times, or just generally anyone who wants to improve themselves. I was fortunate that the first person I approached was a good fit for me. I want to give back to the world, so I’m here to share how to find the right therapist for you.
So Many Options
When you search for licensed psychologists or counselors on Google, you will likely see a long list of people for you to choose from, each with their education, specialties, and experiences. It can feel intimidating to choose one that is suitable for you.
The first thing that you want to look for is therapists with specialties that match what you are looking for. If you are going through grief, there are therapists who have lots of experience in that area. If you are constantly plagued by intrusive thoughts, there are therapists who are specialized in anxiety and the like. If you are dealing with suicidal thoughts, there are therapists who have helped tens to hundreds of people who have gone through similar thoughts. You may also find therapists who practice issues associated with certain age groups, like gender identity challenges in adolescents or death anxiety in the elderly, etc.
The next thing you want to look for is their credentials. Depending on your country’s law or the psychology society, only psychologists who have registered are technically qualified to provide service to the general public. It allows the public to identify who has the appropriate qualifications and ensures that these people will follow the code of conduct and be accountable for their misconduct should it happen. Be sure to look for keywords akin to, but not limited to, “member of the society of counseling”, “registered psychologist”, etc., in their profile.
The sex/gender of the therapist is also often important. Personally, I find male therapists to be more comforting. Granted, I have never had a session with therapists of other sex/gender, but that was what my mind felt comfortable with. Everyone has their own reasoning, and you should definitely evaluate your preference.
You should also look at the language that the therapist practices in. As someone whose mother tongue is Cantonese and fluent in English, I’m actually more comfortable talking about my issues in English. Everyone is different in what they are comfortable with, so it’s important to think about these seemingly trivial factors when picking a therapist.
My Wallet
One of the biggest reasons why people avoid booking a therapy session is the price. If you have perused any private therapist online, you will notice that a single therapy session is expensive. It gets incredibly costly if, say, you have to see your therapist twice a week. Personally, I believe that if you have the income to survive after paying for therapy, it’s absolutely worth it in the long run. But I do empathize that many people can’t afford therapy, here is some potentially useful advice.
- Look for practitioners in public hospitals. Depending on your country, psychologists at public hospitals may cost less than privately owned establishments.
- Look for non-profit organizations that may provide cost-free counseling sessions, though you may have to be eligible to use their service.
- If you are in school, especially in university, the school counselor may refer you to psychologists and the fees may be waived. Definitely discuss with your school counselor to see what options you have.
- If you are working, look at whether there are any health insurance benefits in your company and whether mental health fees are included in the scope of their insurance.
My First Few Sessions Were Not Great
It’s not rare that within the first few sessions, you don’t feel that your therapist is good for you. This is actually completely normal. The therapist-client relationship is like any other relationship. Have you ever talked to someone new and just don’t feel like there are any sparks of friendship? It’s like the two of you just don’t mesh well at all. It’s the same thing with picking a therapist. Sometimes you just can’t find a common ground with your therapist, you just don’t mesh well with them. That’s completely fine, the important thing is to recognize that this isn’t an issue about you, nor it is an issue about the therapist. Don’t lose hope! Be honest with your therapist about how you feel and search for another therapist who you fit better with. Perhaps your previous therapist could even refer you to someone they think would suit you.
Postface
Having the courage to begin seeing a therapist is already difficult, choosing from a sea of therapists could feel intimidating and confusing. Hope this post could help anyone who is in the process of finding a therapist but isn’t sure how to go about it. Feel free to contact me if you want to ask more about this. All the best!